Playing Hurt: Healing emotional injuries in our young women athletes

It is an unusually warm October afternoon and two dozen high school girls are running suicide sprints at soccer conditioning practice at Goldwater High School.

Try-outs are two weeks away.

This Tuesday afternoon an hour and a half practice is not mandatory; Coach Mike Barrera does not even take role. Yet senior Tina Salsburg will wear you out just watching her. She attacks every drill like it is the winning point of a championship game.

Tina plays soccer to stay in shape for her first love, softball. She also does strength training year round.

"I am very serious about my lifting," Salsburg said. "I love it. I am doing it for a cause, so I can play softball in college."

Not all young athletes enjoy their sports as much as Tina. Doctor Brian Murphy shakes his head.

"Often I counsel young women who quit playing for themselves a long time ago and are now playing for their parents," Murphy said.

The doctor is a professor of Sociology and Psychology at South Mountain Community College as well as the school's assistant softball coach.

"Some parents are pushing their girls to play as much softball as you can, play 12 months out of the year, because we want you to earn that scholarship so you can go to college," Dr. Murphy said. Pressure from parents, especially a girl's father cuts deep. Dr. Murphy has seen it first hand.

"Often the father–daughter relationship is built around sport. That is their relationship. Their father is their coach".

"Everything that happens in the gym, on the field, on the court is a metaphor for what will happen later in life", said Dr. Alison Arnold . She is a world renowned mental toughness coach known as "Doc Ali" . She works with many elite athletes, including Olympic-bound gymnasts and figure skaters on Team USA.

"Coming home and throwing your mitt is no different than coming home and throwing your wedding ring and saying 'I am out of here,' " Arnols said. "Keep asking yourself what is the lesson? What is the lesson I want her to learn throughout her life?"

Salsburg has already figured out a lot about her life.

"Getting past the problems and just dropping it all and playing your sport, playing your game, working with everybody else," Salsburg said. "What happens outside of that happens. But when you are there, you are there to play."

Tina is attending Arizona State University's softball camp this year where she can show off her love of playing. She hopes to attend college on a softball scholarship but she says if it is for soccer, that would be OK, too.